Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Wanting more

Over the past few weeks I've caught myself thinking about wanting more out of life. Sometimes I feel as though I'm just living on the surface and going through each day without giving it much thought.
Could this be it? Is this the life I'm supposed to lead? I don't think so. There has to be so much more. And I'm prepared to do something about it.

First of all, I need to stop comparing myself to others. I'm often envious of my friends who have gotten married and started having children. As many of you know, or may not know, Noel and I have been together for 11 years. No, we are not married -- yet. But if it were up to me, this probably would have happened eight years ago! Unfortunately I'm old fashioned, so it's a little out of my hands. I really want to get married and start a family more than ever and I often think how unlucky I am and how I wish I was the one with the little wee babes running around. But I need to remember how blessed I am to have a great person to share my life with. He takes great care of me, he loves me unconditionally and he is my best friend. This is more important than anything.

We also built a beautiful house about four a half years ago. It's a starter home, 1,400 square feet. It's cute. It's perfect for us right now and I love it. But why do I want something bigger? Some of my friends have all upgraded into homes with garages on the front, bonus rooms and big yards. Is it silly to want a bigger home because people around me are buying them? Absolutely! So then why do I feel this way?

We are also currently searching for a vehicle for me as my lease is up at the end of Sept. I've really limited my choices by only wanting SUV's and this has driven Noel crazy. Why do I only want an SUV? Because I want to feel like a soccer mom when in reality I'm not a mom and I don't like soccer! :)

I need to start loving the person that I am inside and out. I'm never going to look like Angelina Jolie or Megan Fox. Someone is always going to have nicer and newer things than me. I need to love what I have and be grateful for that.

I'm glad that I came to this realization because I would hate to continue my thinking this way. It's not what life is about! Comparing yourself to others is not going to make you happy. Being content and grateful for what you have will.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can relate to all of these! I'm glad you are looking at things in a new light!

Kristin O said...

I can relate as well, I am married and not so sure that I'm ready yet for kids but I still envy friends that have them already sometimes, and I also envy the bigger and better always. I just have to take a moment and think about all I have to appreciate already!

Big Mark 243 said...

I think that there is some kind of condition that makes us want to posess the 'next new thing' or something 'bigger and better'. We have to fight the compulsion to appreiciate the here and now along with the valuable things in our lives.

You look young and I hope you continue to have the outlook that you do. Even though you and Noel aren't married, your commitment has spanned a length of time that unfortunately, many marriages never reach. Congrats on that, and hope that you reach your fitness goals!

CeCe said...

I have to say...I know just how you feel. I used to compare myself to others a lot and still have to catch myself from doing that now sometimes. Sometimes it feels like everyone has this fab life going on and you wonder what happened to yours right? Well, it's all about attitude I guess. We just have to be happy with ourselves.